The Exquisite Pain of a Protracted Job Search

One of these guys is finishing second

The only thing worse than having a job is looking for one." This chunk of blunt-force wisdom was bestowed upon me when I was nineteen years old and tenuously employed at a regional (pre-big-box) discount retailer. It was recited (with little affectation) to me by none other than the General Manager at the time (a revolving door position) and it has stuck with me ever since. While somewhat poignant and indisputably concise, the statement has found residence with me more because of who said it, rather than for its content or purpose.

When you're in your late teens and looking forward to the days of summer before college resumes, the last thing you want is the shackles of employment holding you down. The beach, girls, and keg parties beckoned, but the beer money had to come from somewhere so I took a customer service 'job' with the afore-mentioned employer. From the moment I filled out my W-2, I proceded to do as little as humanly possible to maintain my minimum-wage gravy train. After several weeks of late arrivals, long lunches, and exasperated sighs from the area manager, the GM pulled me aside to 'reprogram my attitude.' This was where, as a man of maximum threats but minimal action, he made his statement for the ages.

The GM wanted to instill the fear of losing my job in me by noting how difficult the job market was, but those words are usually wasted on a teenager. Where he succeeded was in helping me realize how a few bad decisions can add up to a life wasted in an unwanted and unrewarding job. Here was a guy in his late forties whose best advice to a subordinate included the words, "the only thing worse than having a job." Not to disparage the discount retail class, but the guy had reached a level of reasonable authority in his career, but he was still required to wear a name tag. Wow. I made a mental note to never settle in my career and always strive for truly satisfying, rewarding work.

Well, mental notes are just that, and they can sometimes get lost under a pile of more pressing responsibilities, like mortgage notes. For a time it seemed like I might be on the same path that my GM was on. I could see what the teenager in me couldn't: we work for more than just personal gratification. We work to survive. More often than not, to achieve career happiness we must integrate our dreams where we can and accept the rest that comes with it. "Do what you love" is a wonderful concept, but sometimes it is only possible to try to love what you do (to paraphrase CSN).

Anyway, when I got the shot to break out on my own, I took it and didn't look back. I would not be my former GM. The company I started enjoyed a few years of moderate success followed by a spectacular crash and burn. The stress it caused me probably took five years off my life. Still, I'll never regret trying to do my own thing (better to regret action than inaction), because it was never somewhere I just ended up. It was what I wanted and strived for. The regret I do have is that I didn't maintain many contacts from my previous job. Networking is everything. Nowadays I am immersed in the second part of that somewhat prophetic pronouncement: I am enduring the "worse" of job hunting. And it, indeed, sucks.

Here I am: educated, experienced, entreprenurial... I have all the requisite 'e's, but I only get one interview for every 100 resumes I send out. And I almost always make it to the third round where it is me and one other nameless, faceless contender. And so far, I have come in second place more than twice. If this were the PGA, I would always on the leader board but five shots off the lead.

Funny what I wouldn't do for a shot at the GM position at the local Dollar General right now.